July to September 2008

It’s been a stressful few months since my last update. The locks, which were installed after my Nana’s errant wandering, allowed some time for my family to make some challenging decisions. My Nana was seen by a team of doctors. Her unsurprising diagnosis was moderate to severe Alzheimer’s disease. While I've been fearful that some accident would cause our family to face Nana's decline, instead my mom has made a decision that is toppling that first domino.

My mom found an apartment and is in the process of moving out. I think she's just had enough. I have no idea how she has endured this long. However, given this major change, I’m not sure how many more updates will be possible once my mom moves out. My mom's sister, A, will move in for a few weeks after my mom moves out. I suspect this experience will determine the future - should an assisted living facility be found for my Nana or should a full time caregiver be brought in. I can't see any other viable alternatives at this point. In spite of her Alzheimer's disease, my Nana's health is otherwise good. This is a very cruel disease.

July 1, 2008
Nana had another adventure today. I left the house at 2:45 to go for therapy. Nana was asleep in her favorite chair in the living room. A2 was due to arrive at 5:00. As she left work, she had a bad feeling about Nana. She came here instead of going home. She arrived at 3:15. She could not find Nana when she came into the house. She found the kitchen door wide open. A2 found Nana lying on the ground in the back yard. A2 is very small. She could not get Nana up from the ground. So she called A to come and help. Together they got Nana back into the house. Nana had hurt her forehead, her hands, and her knees. But basically she is OK. A came back at 6:30 to check on Nana. In a short time Nana was ordering A around.

July 4, 2008
This morning A arrived at about 5:45. She could not find Nana. I had recently heard a sound from K's room, so I told her to check upstairs. She did find her up there, but she was undressed because it was so hot up there. This afternoon A and R came back and put two extra locks on the door. The first one is a hook and eye with a spring clasp. The second device is a plastic door knob that goes over the regular door knob, but must be turned a special way in order to open the door. When A2 came, I showed her how to open the door. Hopefully Nana will not get out doors and fall again, or worse, get into the street. L Avenue is very busy several times a day.

July 14, 2008
The decision that Nana should not be left alone, plus a trip to Australia by A2, has meant that A has been here with Nana often during the past week. Nana has been much happier during that time. She is always happy to see A. Last night when she came into my room to tell me that she wanted to go home, I told her that we were home, and that we did not plan to go out that night. She said OK and went to bed. In the past she has told me the same thing over and over again, sometimes for hours. Last night she just went to bed and stayed there. Seeing more of A has been very good for Nana. It must be difficult for A to fit extra visits into her busy schedule.

July 21, 2008
Twice I have seen Nana try to open the kitchen door now that it has new locks on it. I told Nana that we did not want to go out because it was much too hot. She was very annoyed, but she did go back to her room. I am not sure what would have happened if I had not been there. If she tried to open the door during one of her more lucid periods, she might be successful. But so far the door is holding.

July 25, 2008
Last night when I went to bed, I found an empty packet of dog food on the floor. And I thought, "At least it wasn't cookies this time." Then when M arrived this morning, she discovered that Nana had also given Fluffy a pint of ice cream, a container of fresh berries, and a plastic container of sliced almonds. I do not mind sharing my food with Nana, but I am very unhappy when she gives my food to Fluffy. Nana also spilled something on her bed. M had to strip it completely and wash all the bedclothes. Thankfully Nana was busy inside the house this time.

July 26, 2008
As soon as A left tonight, Nana was on a mission to feed Fluffy. When I told her several times that Fluffy had already had dinner, she would not believe me and became very angry. She finally left the kitchen. Evidently she was just waiting for me to leave the kitchen. First she gave Fluffy one of my sandwich rolls. Fluffy brought it into the living room to show me while she ate it. Then she gave Fluffy one of my fat free ice-cream sandwiches. Fluffy brought that to show me too. Then she brought a raw egg. She was very careful with it and put it on the floor next to my computer. When I next went into the kitchen, the refrigerator door was wide open. Leaving that door open when it is so hot, is not a good thing. I am almost afraid of what I will find when I go into the kitchen to put the egg away. Ah well.....

August 8, 2008
Nana has been confused several days this week. This morning M found her in bed upstairs. At first she did not want to come down stairs. M went back upstairs to get her after about twenty minutes. Then she was willing to come downstairs for breakfast. This evening M took her outside for a while because the weather was nice. Nana did not want to stay long. She is sleeping now.

August 21, 2008
Nana was very confused tonight. She thought that A2 was a man. She said that he was trashing the kitchen and stealing things from the rest of the house. She locked poor Fluffy in her cage because she was following Nana. Fluffy always follows Nana, She wants to be with Nana where ever she goes.

I took a nap. When I awoke and went into the living room, Nana had left her walker next to the dining room table. Then she put a large chair in the pathway so that I was blocked from entering the living room. And Fluffy's water dish was missing from the kitchen. I have not found it yet.

A few months ago I gave Nana a small Teddy bear. At first she wanted to throw it away. Then M talked her into keeping it. A couple of weeks later Saturn sent me a very soft dog. I gave it to Nana. This time she loved the animal at first sight. I would often find her talking to the dog and hugging it. This week I gave her a white bear. She liked it right away too. She kept the animals on a table next to her chair. She called them her family. Yesterday she moved all the animals to a table next to her bed.

September 12, 2008
A took Nana for an evaluation arranged by social services today. It took three hours, and included a social worker, an internist, and a psychiatrist. The diagnosis is moderate to severe Alzheimer’s. But I guess that we knew that all along. Or maybe we all knew except A. Tonight Nana has been looking for Pop and K. She is angry with me because I will not agree that I saw them her. But if I agree that I saw them, then she wants me to find them for her.

September 13, 2008
A has been hiding her head in the sand much longer than I thought possible. Last night she called D to tell her how shocked she was at Nana’s diagnosis. D said that she and C had been trying to tell A the same thing for three years. A still acted shocked when I saw her this morning. Last night Nana kept trying to go upstairs. I was able to stop her as long as I was sitting at my computer. But as soon as I left the room, Nana went upstairs. Evidently she decided to sleep up there because she did not come down until A went up to get her this morning.

September 14, 2008
Yes, I am really looking forward to my new life in [new town]. I have a lot of work to do before I can move, but I am working on it. A is very unlikely to move in with Nana. She rarely stays more than an hour when she does come here. Nana might really be happier in a nursing home. At least she would have other people to talk with there. A thinks that Nana will be happiest here at home. I have never lived alone before. I am looking forward to having a bathroom where no one will come in to see what I am doing, and ask me to tell them about it.

September 20, 2008
A took Nana to see her cardiologist today. He said that she is fine and that he would see her in a year. Later this afternoon, Nana went to have her hair done. When A2 brought her home, she seemed very confused. She kept saying that she wanted to go home. She seems to be most confused when she is tire. She will probably feel better tomorrow.

September 29, 2008
My friend S stopped in during all the chaos to say hello. She is the one who has been urging me for years to move into one of the apartments. A told me yesterday that she plans to move into the house with Nana for two weeks after I move. She hopes to find someone who can live in to stay with Nana through the holidays. After that she is not sure what will happen. She would like Nana to be able to stay in her own house, but that may not be the safest choice for Nana at this point.

October 3, 2008
Everything has been very quiet around here for weeks. I had really gotten used to the new Nana. But last night Nana kept trying to get out of the house to find her car. When I would not help her get out doors, she decided that she had lost her keys. She kept asking me to find her lost keys. This morning she was searching for Pop. This afternoon when I started to go into the living room, I found that the basement door open, and the lights in the basement were on. Today is the first time that Nana has managed to get the basement door open since R put the extra lock on it. Nana was still trying to find Pop when A2 came to take her to the hair dresser. I guess that the quiet time is over.